Sports

The Cincinnati Reds are the worst team in baseball


The Reds have allowed athletes to run across more discs than any other team in baseball.

The Reds have allowed athletes to run across more discs than any other team in baseball.
Picture: beautiful pictures

The Red Devils are a joke. Not a painful knee slap. I’m talking about a “force the audience to ask for a refund” kind of joke, AKA is just plain Amy Schumer doc. The Reds’ record is a terrible 3-22. In other words, only one team in the Modern Era of baseball (since 1901) has had a worse 25-game start to the season than the Reds: the Baltimore Orioles 1988 (2-23). Is there better the percentage of people closest to you who are illiterate (21%) versus the Reds who are winning a game (12%) right now. I don’t know if that’s the worse view for the American education system or the Red Devils.

The Reds scored 3.16 NL-worst runs per game. Nearly half fewer runs per game than the next worst NL team, Arizona (3.5). They scored a total of 79 runs. Combine that with their ERA 6.86 worst Major League teams and you’ve created an absolute disaster. That 6.86 is less than half of the next worst team in MLB, Washington (5.03). If Cincinnati doubles their runs this season, they’ll still be two times behind the earned runs they’ve allowed so far. Essentially, if Cincinnati’s offense is twice as good as theirs, they’re still sitting at just 0.500.

Tanks have never been beautiful. We know this, but at least as a team rises, they are expected to get a great young player with superstar potential with the first overall pick in the draft. That’s still true in baseball, but thanks New CBA effective March, starting in 2023, the worst-performing team in baseball has only a 16.5% chance of winning the first overall pick. Similar odds are awarded to the second and third worst teams in baseball. The fact that this doesn’t start until 2023 doesn’t help the Reds this year either, because the draft odds for 2022 are based on the 2021 standings and the Reds are above .500 in 2021 .

But wait! There’s more! The new CBA also dictates that no team, no matter how bad, can get the top six lottery tickets three years in a row. Basically, if the Reds don’t get together in 2024, they’re just assholes. They couldn’t get a good draft pick, and their team was still crap. Quickly, the Reds found themselves and there was nothing they could do about it. Well, they could have tried to keep Jesse Winker, Eugenio Suarez and Nick Castellanos, I guess. They might as well try to boost their swing or bullpen in the off-season instead of playing with their thumbs, but hey, what do I know? I don’t run a baseball team.

All these changes to the draft mentioned in the new CBA are intended to prevent teams from increasing play. So the geniuses who were the headquarters of the Reds decided that less than two months after the CBA was approved, they would be more powerful than any Panzer IV the Germans could unleash. school during World War II.

Very funny time. They decided to scrap the 2022 season right after the MLB and MLBPA decided to change the draft to make the tank less viable. Remarkable! They read the new CBA, saw what was available, and still decided to trade Eugenio Suarez and Jesse Winker for the Mariners just days later. Truly excellent!



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