I’m here today to tell you the story of what a Clemson basketball player’s “exploding balls” were supposed to be. However, what I’m really doing is trying to write enough dodgy jokes that hit 200 words so this blog post can be Googled before 15,000 other sites post it. So I apologize to Brevin Galloway and his testicles, because I don’t want to devalue myself by digging into whatever happened in his shorts. (The university calls it a “belly problem”.)
This is what happened, according to Galloway
First, a mandatory Twitter video for people who clicked on it, looking for more information beyond the title.
After lifting and taking a nap, “I woke up from a napmy ballS, and my nutsack exploded,” he said.
I’m at 107 words (and counting) so I don’t need many more to hit my goal, so here are some ball jokes that will hopefully put me out of my misery.
Forget gym, sunbathing, laundry — this is the gym, napping,”exploding balls.”
“Larry Bird doesn’t handle the ball as much in one night as you do in an hour.” (RIPPING OFF John candy.)
There is a Sam Cassell Big Balls . Celebration joke somewhere here, I just don’t know how to phrase it without forcing.
Ditto to relate to South Park’s giant ball practice, where Randy drives his wheelbarrows around in wheelbarrows. Maybe if we could combine the music from that episode with this post like it was a MySpace page. I do not know. I live at 249 words, that’s it.